I'll be honest, the only reason I watched this film was because of how twisted the premise was. I mean, everyone needs some good old corpse lovin' every once in a while, right? And although the concept is roughly about as twisted as one could expect, much of the follow through of the film itself is simply not committed enough to really make it as powerful as it could have been. It's disturbing, yes, but it lacks the impact that a more exploitative film could have had. What "Cold Storage" needed was to go all out crazy instead of being simply weird and a bit gross.
The glue that held the movie together was Clive, the main (protagonist?) character who finds the body, who he names Rosalee. He's played by Nick Searcy, and plays him in a way that it's difficult to really look at him like he's a monster. Ok, it's actually quite easy to do so, but the guy really doesn't know any better. In fact there were several points during the film that I wasn't quite sure whether or not Clive was even aware of the concept of the woman being dead. However, this is inconsistent. He talks to her like normal, makes her food, and gives her a ride into town at one point to show her the sights. On the other hand he realizes that she smells really bad, takes measures to make sure nobody else ever sees her, and at the end tries to "make another" Rosalee by trying to kill another woman.
It's like "Deliverance" if it was also "Nekromantik" and "While You Were Sleeping."
For that reason it's a little confusing as to Clive's state of mind. Is he a sick necrophiliac, a simpleton who doesn't understand the concept of death, or both? It would have been nice and more disturbing for "Cold Storage" to stick with one of those choices instead of trying to have it both ways. In fact it would have been far more disturbing and sad if he really was just a simpleton trying to find a companion to love, which is pretty much a hopeless battle. And if this hopelessness and loneliness had led to this depravity, it could have had a strong message about how much being alone and unable to find love can torment a person and drive them to do these hideous things.
Most of the first half of the film is made up of the simpleton version of Clive, as he tries to make everything perfect for his new bride, or as he calls her, his gift from God. Meanwhile, the girl's sister and boyfriend are out trying to find her, as she has gone missing. As the movie heads into the back half it starts becoming more and more horror based, as Clive starts getting desperate to hide her from people, and the search begins to close in on him. That's when he starts getting violent and stuff, which really puts a damper on the innocent qualities he was exhibiting earlier, and by the end he's a full-blown slasher movie villain. I just think a bit more tragedy would have made "Cold Storage" a bit more memorable.
I do have to commend Nick Searcy's performance, however, because it was very good. The moments where he's trying to be a good "husband" come across as disturbingly genuine, and as twisted as it is, you feel really sorry for the guy.
That is, until he starts bashing people in the head with a club.
So in the end, there isn't too much to recommend "Cold Storage" unless the concept of the twisted plot sounds interesting to you. Don't worry, no judgement here. Hell, it got ME to watch it. Apart from that, the only other things of note in the film is one particularly disturbing moment, and yes it's disturbing even in the context of a movie where a dude has sex with a corpse. All I'll say is that if you have any kind of phobia involving teeth, I'd possibly look elsewhere. No gory details, but there's a scene that involves teeth and a straight razor. I've said too much already, haven't I?
Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go vomit.
THE BOTTOM LINE - "Cold Storage" is a well acted pseudo-horror film that really isn't worth watching apart from the gross concept and coining of the term "blow-up-erizing" regarding calling someone's phone a lot. Oddly enough, this is a film that could have benefited a bit from being a bit grosser. Then it would have at least been more memorable. Skip it unless you're curious.
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